The real difficulty experienced by most of us in keeping up our courage in the unceasing battle of life is that we realize how utterly we depend upon ourselves. Of course, it is true that the grace of God will be always with us, that it is never withheld, and that there is always a sufficiency of it for us to meet and triumph over every assault of the evil one. Yet even so, the disquieting thought comes home to us that it is always ourselves who determine our own actions—so much so that, indeed, if our actions are worthy of reward, it is we who obtain the reward and if our actions are worthy of punishment, it is we who suffer.
Saint Thomas says with stimulating paradox: “Not partly by God and partly by man, but altogether by God and altogether by man.”
That is to say, I have to reconcile these two separate truths:
(a) I cannot will anything without God’s grace helping me to do it;
(b) yet, God’s help does not take away from me my responsibility in the act, for its moral value will be adjudged to my credit or demerit.
The difficulty lies then, just in the second part of the paradox. Conscious as I am of my past failure, I can hardly look forward to future troubles without dismay. Consequently, I turn to see if the Church teaches anything that can relieve me from the burden of this discouragement. Is there any doctrine that, in any way at all, gives me an escape from the terror of my own responsibility?
